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kissmeprobieTitle: Reflexive
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
jack_infinitude
Fandom: NCIS
Pairing: Anthony DiNozzo/Timothy McGee
Rating: R
Warnings: Dub-con, slash.
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS.
His reflection in the bathroom mirror would sicken him if he looked.
There are marks on his neck, bruises caused by Tony’s forceful mouth. They trail down to his collarbone, which is spattered with dried blood; Tony bit him at the wrong moment, and accidentally broke the skin. At least he said he was sorry.
Timothy does not feel well. His head is aching, and the inside of his mouth is as dry as the Valley of Death. He supposes that he must have been drinking, but he doesn’t remember having any fun. He slaps the handle on his sink, and water begins running from the tap. He sticks his head underneath it; the temperature is freezing, and when his teeth scrape together, he shudders at the combined sensations. The pounding in his head increases, but that’s alright; McGee doesn’t want to be comfortable right now.
Tim fumbles for a towel after he turns off the water and sloughs the water off his hair. Maybe they’ll think that he got a shower before coming into work; that would work to his advantage, and, hell, maybe it will help him avoid Tony’s guilty eyes.
After his hair is dried, he returns to the sink to brush his teeth and shave his face. The razor cuts his jaw, but it stops bleeding after a few seconds and he ignores it after that. The pain is nothing but a sliver of feeling, and is nothing in comparison to the raw burn in his throat, the kind he gets when he’s sick and coughing. Or when someone forces his mouth open and pumps against the back of his throat, hard and fast.
He continues his routine, getting dressed and brushing his hair. Except he doesn’t look at his reflection in the mirror. Cannot look at his reflection, because of the memories that are rolling around his brain, rattling on the sides of his skull like a sickening game of pinball. His left thigh aches as he remembers how Tony had dug his fingers into his leg, even as DiNozzo pressed deeper and deeper inside.
What makes it worse is that Tony had kissed him before he left. Had taken Tim’s face in his hands and kissed him with passion and heat, with everything that was supposed to mean love.
Except it isn’t love. This is the farthest thing from love that Timothy can think of.
He still can’t look at himself in the mirror. He doesn’t want to see himself, pale and ghost like with the eyes of a beaten dog.
McGee doesn’t realize his hands are shaking until he has to button up his shirt, and then everything boils down to the knowledge that he has to face Tony today; has to look him in the eye, play the straight man and act like nothing happened.
Nothing did happen, he tries to tell himself. I could have said ‘no’ anytime I wanted, I really could have.
But he isn’t good at lying to anyone. Including himself.
Tim leaves his apartment shivering, even though it isn’t cold. He feels like a stranger in his own skin.
Author:
jack_infinitudeFandom: NCIS
Pairing: Anthony DiNozzo/Timothy McGee
Rating: R
Warnings: Dub-con, slash.
Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS.
His reflection in the bathroom mirror would sicken him if he looked.
There are marks on his neck, bruises caused by Tony’s forceful mouth. They trail down to his collarbone, which is spattered with dried blood; Tony bit him at the wrong moment, and accidentally broke the skin. At least he said he was sorry.
Timothy does not feel well. His head is aching, and the inside of his mouth is as dry as the Valley of Death. He supposes that he must have been drinking, but he doesn’t remember having any fun. He slaps the handle on his sink, and water begins running from the tap. He sticks his head underneath it; the temperature is freezing, and when his teeth scrape together, he shudders at the combined sensations. The pounding in his head increases, but that’s alright; McGee doesn’t want to be comfortable right now.
Tim fumbles for a towel after he turns off the water and sloughs the water off his hair. Maybe they’ll think that he got a shower before coming into work; that would work to his advantage, and, hell, maybe it will help him avoid Tony’s guilty eyes.
After his hair is dried, he returns to the sink to brush his teeth and shave his face. The razor cuts his jaw, but it stops bleeding after a few seconds and he ignores it after that. The pain is nothing but a sliver of feeling, and is nothing in comparison to the raw burn in his throat, the kind he gets when he’s sick and coughing. Or when someone forces his mouth open and pumps against the back of his throat, hard and fast.
He continues his routine, getting dressed and brushing his hair. Except he doesn’t look at his reflection in the mirror. Cannot look at his reflection, because of the memories that are rolling around his brain, rattling on the sides of his skull like a sickening game of pinball. His left thigh aches as he remembers how Tony had dug his fingers into his leg, even as DiNozzo pressed deeper and deeper inside.
What makes it worse is that Tony had kissed him before he left. Had taken Tim’s face in his hands and kissed him with passion and heat, with everything that was supposed to mean love.
Except it isn’t love. This is the farthest thing from love that Timothy can think of.
He still can’t look at himself in the mirror. He doesn’t want to see himself, pale and ghost like with the eyes of a beaten dog.
McGee doesn’t realize his hands are shaking until he has to button up his shirt, and then everything boils down to the knowledge that he has to face Tony today; has to look him in the eye, play the straight man and act like nothing happened.
Nothing did happen, he tries to tell himself. I could have said ‘no’ anytime I wanted, I really could have.
But he isn’t good at lying to anyone. Including himself.
Tim leaves his apartment shivering, even though it isn’t cold. He feels like a stranger in his own skin.
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Date: 2009-05-19 08:15 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-15 12:45 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-19 08:16 pm (UTC)